There are hawks, waiting on my school grounds; they lay in wait on roofs of dorms, ruffling their wings and judging the students. They flourish on pigeons, mostly, on plump pigeon thighs like the rats underground. There is a very strict set of rules for being a pigeon, which I avoid as thoroughly as feasible, just in case. I've seen friends lose noses just for glancing the wrong direction at the wrong time, head cocked and shiny squinting black bird eyes, sharp nose like a beak. I noticed a set of wings before, feathered and bound together by a rope of meat and bone, laying on the ground, a flight attendant's gold-tone beloved lapel pin. I found a pair of hands, fingers splayed like feathers, wholesale watches stacked aroundon each wrist like bandages.

When you go elsewhere it's not the hawks who threaten you, it's the homeless, and then squinting is the only answer to the situation. You squint at the clouds, at the one grey fog that covers the entire skyhorizon, at the white rubber toes of your shoes on the cracking ground. You wouldn't look them in the eye; they're watching for weaknesses, like the hawks, seeing if you blink. The man had an holy body and a pocket full of wholesale watches, flashy and gold and glittery enough to lure in his magpies.

My mother's birthday was three days ago, her voice hollow through the phone line, a late reminder dropped into my inbox like a pair of rotting isolated bird wings. I thought about getting her a group of wholesale watches, one for every feeling; the gold-tone plastic like a half-remembered lapel pin for when she wants a distraction, cheap silver to stain her arms dark, the circular black watch dial is a bird's eye. If the hawk sees it and gets confused I could discover her hands spread like feathers on the ground but she'll be able to read the birthday card I made can't reach her before her hands are gone, I made it flat. It's impossible to read a bent card when the postal truck is so unreliable.

I pray this letter finds you healthy. I pray the hawk has found you first.